You know why yoga works for me? Because it forces me to SLOW down. This American culture is run at a frantic brake-necked speed. For some of us, our calendars for the year have ink from one end to the other by January 2.
In our town, the speed limit is 75 mph–plenty fast but apparently, for most people, not fast enough.
We multitask– folding laundry while watching the news, writing texts while sitting at stop lights, just getting one more email in while “helping” our kids with their homework.
Even when exercising, we have our smartphones with us; catching up a show we missed last night or reading that article we have to discuss at work the next day.
I don’t know about you but I’m tired.
This pace, this type of life, this is not what I believe we were called to live.
We are told to be still and know that He is God. How can we do that when our minds are full of to do lists and tasks not yet marked out?
In my quest to figure out how I want my life to look–as a wife, a mother, a friend, a coworker, I have begun reading. And I’ve been back on my mat more.
And you know what kills me? I struggle saying the mat is enough for today. It’s okay to JUST do yoga; to not add a run or a walk. It’s okay to JUST sit and breath for a minute. It’s okay to JUST focus on my kids and what words are coming out of their mouths.
Last night in the kitchen, while cleaning up for dinner, my son turned to me and asked me, “Mama, are you tired?” My answer, “No but why did you ask?”
True to his sweet heart, he simply said, “Mama, you just seem not yourself these past few weeks.”
And a dagger went into my heart.
My first response was to be defensive. Hell yes, I haven’t been myself. I’m overwhelmed and tired. I’m working A LOT while your Dad is gone on trips for work. I’m busy trying to make healthy meals for your bottomless stomachs. I’m driving all over kingdom come to make sure you have positive experiences in your lives. I’m trying to use my “two eyes, two hands” with your little sister despite the fact that I just want to run away and say, “Hell with it!” Yes little man, I am sure tired.
Then I grew sad. So very sad. Because the one thing I wanted to do, to be my kid’s mom, I’m not doing well. Instead I’m busy doing everything for everyone and not doing any of it well. I’m moving at such crazy speeds that I can’t do anything well.
Then I read this article today from a friend. While this is about overeating and why we do that; what I was struck with is this sentence…
“Gradually, I began (and am still learning) to appreciate my body for showing up for me. If I want to stand up, my legs work. If I want to eat, my insides digest my food. If I wanted to see, I open my eyes. For me, acknowledging my feelings is the key to loving my body.”
See, if I cannot appreciate me, the very nature of what makes me a mother, a wife, a friend, a daughter–then I cannot serve those people well.
And back to yoga I come again. Because when I’m on that mat, breathing and holding a pose, it’s about that moment..just me, my breath and my legs–it’s about me saying, “I surrender. I will move slow. I will focus just for this minute on being attuned to my heart’s needs.”
“Love yourself—accept yourself—forgive yourself—and be good to yourself, because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.” ~Leo F. Buscaglia
Here’s the article. Like I said, the title says The Most Common Cause for Overeating and How to Overcome It BUT the core of this article is about understanding who we are and why we are here.