From mother to child

Since we began this process, I have felt a great need to pray for our daughter’s birth mother.  My heart and my mind was constantly reflecting and thinking of her, especially over the past nine months.

About a month ago, that soul need to pray and think of her melted away.  I woke up the other day and realized that I had not thought of my baby’s mother in a long time. (I wonder if perhaps she gave birth to our daughter a month ago, or that she passed away?)  Instead, our daughter has filled my heart.  I have felt a tremendous longing to be her mother, to care for her and let her know that everything is okay.

Last night as I lay in bed with Tobin, I had my hand on his back and could smell his yummy just bathed self (love the smell of  little people right after they get all cleaned up!).  My first thought was,  Who is doing this for my other child halfway across the world?  Who is rubbing her back to get her to sleep tonight?  Who is picking her up when she cries because she is sad and scared? Who is giving her a bottle, talking and smiling at her while she eats?  Who is doing this?

And this Mommy decided that is my  new prayer, my new drive until I can be the one to help answer those questions. I am praying that this little girl will have those people in her life until I can get there, that she’ll have someone to rub her back, sing her songs, tell her that she is VERY special and let her know that her forever family is on their way, very soon.

I am taking action.  Instead of being sad, I am putting all that emotion into prayer for my little girl.  God loves us and it says that “He gives us the desires of our hearts.”  I am believing today that he sees this mommy’s desire to love on her baby NOW and will bring people to do that until I can get there.  This I believe!