It has been a strange few days since we got our referral. I feel like I’m living with one foot in this world, and the other foot across the world.
I have found myself moved to tears, thinking about our daughter’s story (what little we know) and her life these past 2 months. Two months. That’s not a long time when you think about one’s life. But in her life, 2 months has carried her on a journey to many places already.
This Mommy’s heart is getting pretty emotional when I stop and reflect on those big eyes. I look forward to the day (hopefully very soon) when I can hold her in my arms, sing her the song that’s been in my heart all these months, rock her to sleep and tell her how deeply she’s been loved.
I wrote a post in April about how my heart had stopped thinking and praying for her mother and instead turned to our daughter. This morning I looked up my thoughts about that post in my journal. From the time line provided by our agency, it seems that my heart knew that our daughter was being born right about then! Wild! Once again I see God’s hand in this adoption, all the way down to such a small detail as this Mommy feeling the need to pray especially hard for her daughter that day!
We have also learned that our daughter is enjoying some really yummy high calorie milkshakes every day! Yes, the formula drive that so many of you GENEROUSLY donated to is in fact, helping our daughter gain weight and grown strong and healthy. WOW, again, how amazing that God used another one of my heart’s nudgings to help our baby girl.
I keep coming to that passage of Scripture in Matthew 6: 26
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
How much more valuable are we? I completely get it now. I get how you can love someone you have NEVER met. I get how you can long and cry and pray for someone who you have never hugged. I look at our baby girl all day long, pray for her little body that it will stay healthy. I pray for her spirit that she will be strong and know that this Mommy and Daddy, all the way around the world, are loving her and praying for her to come home soon!
Amen!
I was born in Jos, Nigeria many years ago. I spent the next nineteen years living in Liberia, Kenya and Ethiopia.
We discovered that LeighAnna had (most likely) been conceived the same week we decided to officially begin her adoption. These red threads that tie our stories together are such a gift that God gives us during the adoption process. SO GLAD to hear she is getting good nutrition!!
Oh, my heart is rejoicing and aching with you today! Congratulations on the new baby girl!! What joy!
We will pray for a successful court date and for the whole family as the wait becomes more intense.
Many, many blessings!
Melody,
I don’t know if you got my card this week, but I wrote that on Sat. and when I wrote it, I was thinking about the emotions you were experiencing in your waiting. Now that you have seen your baby girl, I think you need to feel that you are both in the Shadow of His Wings more than ever. It is so hard to wait for a referral, but I think that once you have a picture to go with your dream it really amps up the ache in your heart and the strong need to get to your baby. God has you both safely in His arms. If I can do anything for you during this emotional time, please let me know.
Laura
so special when you see the puzzle pieces come together and start to see the big picture that God has planned. Thanks for sharing!