How do I do this thing called parenting?

Lately, Parenting has been a challenge for me.  I find myself looking at my children’s behavior and wondering, “Is this how I act?  Do they do this because they see it in me?”

There was an incident yesterday with a child of ours.  This child became very frustrated over some stuff of theirs, stuff that was shared (with my permission) with other children.  This child became a weepy mess, very upset and angry that their things were played with by others.  The reaction was not pretty.  It was very ugly.  We dealt with it.

I apologized for my part in the incident.  I should not have allowed these items to be played with by others without asking this child. BUT the bigger issue was the selfishness that I saw from this child.  It was big and ugly.

I’ve been thinking about this all night and now the morning.  I have seen the behavior more and more often with both my older children (Desta is all about the bottle, toys and her crib right now…her time will come…)  And frankly, I get sad. I wondered what I can do.  Do I act this way? I know my children copy what I do and say.

There are times I’d like to pack up my family and flee far away from this materialistic world we live in.  BUT then I remember that it is not only what’s around me that influences us, it’s what is in our hearts.  It would come right with us, maybe appear different (like sharing a coconut vs several toys) but it is still there.

I’m wondering, praying and searching myself.  As I remind Caroline and Tobin all the time, it takes hard work and perseverance to do something the right way.

PS  And just because she’s so darn cute, I had to post a photo of Desta in her “jogging” suit.  (She’s doing so great with her sleeping lately, thanks to Daddy’s boot camp.  Three hour nap yesterday mid morning and then up only ONCE last night.  Matthew, my husband, has been getting up with her and she’s finally getting the idea that maybe sleep is a good thing!)